Monday, October 10, 2011

Sometimes it's better to keep your mouth closed...

I talk for a living.

That's just the way it is.

Sometimes I get sick of the sound of my own voice.

And I'm sure my own children would say they get sick of me talking too - even when I'm not working!

The Princess is going through that dreaded "tween" stage (what a ridiculous notion made up by marketing 'experts' I reckon), and sometimes it proves to be a real challenge.

Especially in the age of Facebook, mobile phones, and constant pressure to have the latest of whatever gadget or thing is currently the 'cool' thing at school.

And moreso because she is one of the rare types at school who does not have Facebook, a mobile phone, isn't allowed free access to the family computer (and their accounts are heavily restricted time-wise and site-wise), they are given a set bedtime which is a lot earlier than many of their peers, they do not watch music video shows unless it's Rage and it's a retro edition and I'm watching it with them, they are not allowed free rein to watch much over a PG rating on tv or dvds, and being caught swearing means having to face the consequences, they do not have Ds's or X-boxes or whatever and the video game consoles they do have are only allowed to be brought out to play with on weekends or school holidays when there is nothing else to do and their games are G or PG rated.

Yes, they are sheltered from 'the outside world' as much as possible but we aren't blinded to the fact they will be exposed to stuff that we don't agree with.

But we'd rather The Princess and Little Man have the ability to be children for as long as possible and be protected from many of the evils in the world.  

We do discuss things with them, we do explain things to them, but we do it in a way that gives them enough information to educate them and hopefully protect them.

Hopefully they will grow up with a 'strong moral compass' and understand right from wrong.

And be proud of who they are and what they do.

But I wonder how many of her friends' parents would think to communicate without speaking?

Positive communication, that is?

This is one of my favourite ways of 'talking' with her, and him for that matter.

Through little notes like these - random notes in lunch boxes, folded in clean washing, under a pillow, tucked into a corner of her light switch.

That kind of thing.

I'm not a perfect mum, but I do my best.

And besides, I can never recall my own mum doing anything like this for us when I was a child.


  1. What a lovely idea, I think I will be popping a note in my kids lunch boxes next week :) Thanks for visiting my site today :)

  2. I've always wanted to do this - but just never got around to doing it. I'm with you when it comes to limiting time spent on technology. I also try not to fill their spare time/weekends with too many 'activities'. Boredom is good for kids - it inspires them to use their imagination. The whole family blog thing started because I wanted more control - better to blog than to facebook.

  3. You are doing really, really well to be able to set those guidelines! I have young "tween/teenagers" and there can be a lot of peer pressure at this age. And sometimes I hear "but everyone else does..." (whatever it is)! I think the notes idea is gorgeous - I used to do it when they were younger and am glad you have reminded me about it. I sometimes write a meaningful card with their dad, to acknowledge their efforts in school and sport and say how much we love them ... not just save it for birthdays and Christmas, etc.

  4. Thanks for dropping by.

    I got the idea for the lunch notes years ago watching an old episode of Shabby Chic and I thought, what a great idea!

    The kids even leave notes for me which is really sweet. And I keep almost all of them, too.


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